a blog about raising a daughter with cerebral palsy and learning unexpected lessons along the way

Sunday, February 14, 2010


I have mentioned in previous posts the independent, big girl that Oia is growing into and it's so indescribable to explain the joy that this two year brings to us every single day. Funny how someone can barely speak, yet still understands and tells us so much.

Which brings Rob and I to the topic of discipline. We have tossed around discussion of when is the right time to begin disciplining Oia. She is globally delayed...this covers cognition...would she have the cognitive skills yet to understand us when we try to discipline her? Really, her behavior doesn't yet warrant discipline but on occasion maybe some guidance or modeling of certain behaviors but not discipline per se. We model how to greet others, how to play nicely with other little ones, etc. She's not a hitter, not a biter, not a pusher or shover, doesn't yank toys from others, and she isn't really verbal so talking back is out of the picture for now. The only thing that seems to be an issue at this point is that she throws things at the most inopportune times...and boy, does she have an arm! So, Rob and I agreed that this was not appropriate behavior since someone could end up hurt or something could end up broken.

So, let the discipline games begin. Tonight was our first, real, trial at disciplining. Oia was playing with a new Snoopy toy that plays music. She loved it, played with it for a few minutes and then she launched it. It landed on the floor but was close to hitting me. Sometimes we think she does this for a reaction but then other times we think it's just sheer excitement that takes over. Whatever the reason, throwing toys is not a good idea. So, Rob firmly squeezed her hand and gave her a stern 'NO'. She froze. Then, she looked up at Rob and said very sheepishly and softly in reply, 'no'. Then, out came the lip. The bottom lip. The lip that prefaces a blushed face and a cry which means that someones little feelings have just been crushed. She got the message. She understood.

I'm not sure who felt worse; Oia or daddy.......

But, that's okay. In some sort of crazy, special needs kind of way it's really a beautiful thing to get such a reaction from our 2 year old. Looking at the silver lining.......it's just another moment that confirms cognitive development and receptive language. I am sure many toddlers have adorned pouty lips and right now Oia is no different.


  1. Great job mom and dad! That lip sure is hard on the heart, isn't it?

  2. Oh Mo,
    We have struggled with the exact same issue with Faith! She loves to throw stuff and it is so hard to distiguish play from being a stinker and that she is using her arm and strengthening it! We call it her "rocket arm"! We joke that she will be a softball pitcher! The disipline part is sure hard and Faith does the same lip thing, too. It breaks my heart.

  3. That is great for you to help her understand right from wrong...and she understood!

  4. Good job! It's so hard, isn't it? But it is by far the right thing to do.

    Now, you wanna come and do it with Parker? :D

  5. Discipline is THE hardest thing for me (possibly tied with the ferber method - making her cry it out at night). But I do it because I fear what could happen if she isn't properly disciplined. I'm just glad I'm not alone in this!